Paul Taylor: How is God in the Details of our Lives?
Paul was devastated when his son was diagnosed with Down Syndrome, but he came to see not only the power and impact of one life but how God works in the details of our lives.
Episode Discussion Points
How his birth date ended up changing the outcome of his life.
God is in the details of our life—learning to submit to God in all things
The story of Mark (their 5th of 6th child) being born
Hearing the news that Mark had Down Syndrome, which initially devastated him
What helped him literally and figuratively “get up off the closet floor” after the diagnosis
The Down Syndrome support group they joined in the Chicago area which changed their entire perspective on being parents of a child with disabilities and how to be an advocate for your child.
How their advocacy and Mark changed an entire school district’s opinion of special needs children
Sometimes you have to take a step of faith into the darkness, and give yourself grace if you move slower than you think you should—God doesn’t give up on us.
“Life isn’t a summation of good and bad. It is a picture you build over time."
The significance of the Footprints in the Sand story for him personally
Lesson in divine love from being buried in the snow on a Scout Campout with Mark
Choosing how to react toward life’s difficulties with softness or anger
Sometimes prayers bring about miracles, and other times you have to learn to let someone you love go, like his daughter Sarah
We’re here to learn and grow but when it is time to pass on we can take comfort in what Sarah shared with her father, “It's nice over there.”
The importance of remembering times when God has helped you through hard times and reminding yourself that if He did it then, He will do it again.
A father’s perspective on the influence and capacity of his child
The power and impact of one life
Lessons From Mark
It’s not about him, its about Mark and what Mark has taught him and those around him throughout their life
The spiritual impressions he personally learned that every person has great worth
Don’t underestimate the power one person can have to change people and programs with God’s help
Lesson in divine love after being buried in the snow on a Scout Campout with Mark
These special needs souls have a divine gift to influence so many people
Favorite Bible Verse
Psalm 46:10, “Be Still and know that I am God.”
Connect With Paul
Buy His book, “Mark and Me.”
Website: PaulTaylorauthor.com
Facebook and Instagram @PaulTaylorAuthor
#tamarakanderson #storiesofhopeinhardtimes #podcast #hope #God #hardtimes #specialneedschild #downsyndrome #Godinthedetails #peace #thepowerofone #Godslove
Transcription
You can find the transcription of today's episode here:
Paul Taylor 0:02
Life is not a summation of good and bad. It's a picture that you slowly build over time. And that some of those negative experiences when you stepped into the dark, actually are the threads or the mosaic or the tiles that tie something together later in your life. So, I no longer tried to look at pluses and minuses I tried to look at my life more in totality.
Tamara Anderson 0:34
Welcome to Stories of Hope Hard Times, the show that explores how people endure and even thrive in difficult times, all with God's help. I'm your host Tamara K Anderson. Join me on a journey to find inspiring stories of hope and wisdom learned in life's hardest moments.
Tamara Anderson 0:59
My guest today and his wife Susan are the parents of six children and 14 grandchildren and live in Eagle, Idaho. They have moved 15 times in their 52 years of marriage living in 10 states and even Germany for a few years. He is the oldest of 10 children and grew up in Seattle, Washington with a stay at home mother and a psychiatrists father, both who had significant influence on how he views life. He spent most of his business career raising funds domestically and internationally, and investing funds in commercial real estate. He has written extensively to extended family and friends through the years and after encouragement from them has begun to fulfill his life's dream to become a writer. I am pleased to present Paul Taylor. Paul, are you ready to share your story of hope?
Paul Taylor 1:49
I Yes, I am. Thank you.
Tamara Anderson 1:51
It is exciting to have you on today. It really, really is. And I thought we would break the ice by talking a little bit about the significance of your birthday.
Paul Taylor 2:03
Um, yeah, I probably one of the few whose birthday actually shaped their adult life. It goes back to I was delivered on August 10. Had my mother delivered me on August 9, or had she delivered me on August 11th. I'd never would have received a draft notice during the Vietnam War. And that draft notice subsequently changed and substantially changed my life path I was married. For about a year when I received that notice I was planning to go to law school. And that draft notice then changed my life and changed my career path. Because I went in the Army for a while. Sorry, being born on August 10. There's a significant day and change that really changed my life history.
Tamara Anderson 2:54
Wow. And it really I think boils down to God is in the details of our lives, don't you think? Yes.
Paul Taylor 3:01
More and more. I've come to realize that and accept that sometimes I don't want to accept that. But I think I'm getting a little bit better and realizing that that God is in charge if we allow Him? And if we submit?
Tamara Anderson 3:19
Hmm, yeah. You really hit the nail on the head there. I think I've been actually pondering about that recently, as I've been doing my scripture studies and just thinking back on my own life about the importance of learning to trust God and lean on him completely. Sometimes when a change happens, we're a little hesitant because we're like, that is not what I expected. You know?
Paul Taylor 3:47
Yeah. You know, sometimes when we're in the heat of the moment, it's difficult to have that perspective. 20 years later, three years later, four years later, five years later, we could look back and say, Wow, that was not as bad as I thought it was in the heat of the moment. And so, in the heat of the moment, it's a little bit difficult at times, but I agree with you, we need to submit and he is in the details if we allow him.
Tamara Anderson 4:16
Yes, absolutely. Well, we're going to talk about how God influenced your life today and was in the details of things that you probably didn't initially think was a positive thing. You thought it was something very hard. Would you mind sharing that story with us?
Paul Taylor 4:36
Well, I guess the primary one here is our son Mark. Mark is the fifth of six children. We were expecting, you know, a wonderful delivery and whatever else and Susan had gone into, she had long deliveries. And so we went into the hospital. This was in the Chicago Your area and we went into this hospital late Thursday afternoon. And Mark was finally delivered early Friday morning, about 1:30 in the morning. And we were happy, the doctors were happy. They told us we had a fine son and the delivery went well. And so I spent a little bit of time with Susan, and then went home to take care of the other four kids.
Paul Taylor 5:25
And later that Friday afternoon, I got a call. We didn't have caller ID. So I didn't know who was calling. And I was trying to get the four kids together into the van and go up and see mom and see Mark at the hospital. And I answered the phone and it was Susan. And I could tell immediately that something was wrong. I wasn't sure market died. But she through the conversation, which I'll spare part of it now. But she basically asked me if I was alone somewhere enough not to go somewhere where I was alone. So I knew something was was up.
Paul Taylor 6:02
And so I made our way up my way upstairs to our master bedroom closet close to the bedroom door, closed the closet door and was insulated from the kids downstairs and Susan told me that Mark had Down syndrome. It's difficult to even now recount that story. And I collapsed to the floor. And I thought my life was ruined. But I had to get up off the floor, I had to get up up the floor figuratively I had to get up off the floor physically. And I came to realize within a couple of days that it was not about me. It was about Mark.
Paul Taylor 6:47
And that was the first lesson that Mark began to teach me even though he was a couple of days old is that it was not about me, it was about him. And it was a different relationship that was being established. And I have since come to realize that that was probably outside of maybe marrying Susan, one of the most important things that ever happened in my life from an internal perspective, because what he has taught me and and my other children. I don't mean he is my favorite. It's just he has unique talents and gifts that he is he shares with us and and others around him. And he has been the most unexpected blessing in my life. Never in my life would I have thought that I would have a child with disabilities. I never would have thought that a child with disabilities could teach me so much. And he is a great blessing in my life,
Tamara Anderson 7:46
Paul was able to write an amazing book called Mark in me. And I was blessed to be able to read it just this past weekend. And as the parent of a child with actually two children with disabilities, it was so many of the things that you were talking about, I could really relate to, you know, it's amazing how much these children with special needs can change us for the better if we let it right. And so I want to kind of go back to that moment when you heard that your son had Down syndrome and an ask you what gave you the strength to get up off the floor that day. Because I know how that feels. I know how devastated I was when our son Nathan initially got his diagnosis.
Paul Taylor 8:35
I guess I would like to say that the Lord inspired me to get up. But I think it took a couple of days for me to get to that point. I think it was first of all just the reality. I had to get up. I didn't know what this situation foretold for the future. But I just know I had to get up. I had four other children who are waiting downstairs. And even though I was crying on the closet floor, they were part of my responsibility as well.
Paul Taylor 9:11
So I guess the first aspect Tamara, I just had to get up over the next couple of days is when I began to have I guess more spiritual understanding spiritual awareness, spiritual hope that things would not be as bad as I thought they were in those first couple of seconds. I mean, I'm not sure what your experience was. And I didn't die. But I know people who have had near death experiences talk about how their life flashes before them in just a couple of seconds. Well, much of my life flashed before me in a couple of seconds thinking about an I thought. How does the mind work so fast like that? So I guess the answer is first of all, I realized I had to get up And it was then after a couple of days that I began to have feelings of the Spirit and whatever else that things could work out. There was still a lot of struggle and a lot of issues that we had to deal with. But it took a couple of days, I think, for the Lord to begin to soften my heart, that things would be okay.
Tamara Anderson 10:25
Yeah, absolutely. And I experienced something similar. I think you just kind of go through the motions for a few days, you know, physically. And Emotionally, it takes longer. You're right. It absolutely does.
Paul Taylor 10:39
Yeah, I mean, I, you know, people ask me about that. And I, again, I can only say, and whatever was mentally going on in my mind or mentally was going on in your mind, to some degree had to be pushed to the back part or to the rear? Because you have, and we have other obligations and responsibilities that are equally as important.
Tamara Anderson 11:02
Yes. So, absolutely. And I think that emotional understanding and submission, it comes little at a time as we're able to process it, don't you think?
Paul Taylor 11:15
Yes. And I would say, again, I write about it in the book, Susan, in those first couple of months that after Mark was born, and we were getting ready, because he was going to have open heart surgery, which is another story. But she made contact with a group of women in the Chicago area where we lived at the time, who each had a child with Down syndrome, young child with Down syndrome. And those women played a significant role in shaping our approach to how to live and deal with Mark, and also gave me a perspective that I hadn't hadn't had before that mark, if the individual soul and spirit does have great worth, that prior to mark, my feeling a lot of times and associating with, with other kids with disabilities was they were more a burden or whatever else.
Paul Taylor 12:10
These women helped me understand a true Christian Gospel principle that everybody has worth. And it changed my perspective on how to go forward with Mark. And it, it really has shaped how we have tried to raise him. And because of that, I think he has been a significant not because of us, but his own personality, he was able to influence so many other people for good.
Tamara Anderson 12:38
I love that. And I love how the power of finding a tribe of people, either who've been through something similar, or maybe who are even a year or two or five or 20 years ahead of you can give you that help and perspective of oh, I can get through this. Right.
Paul Taylor 12:59
Yeah, and these women? Again, I'm not sure what your experience was our experience was, there are some people, including some of his doctors, who which was a growing number early on, who basically said, Well, why do you want to? Why are you so concerned, he has Down syndrome. And I mean, the attitudes have changed a lot since the late 80s. But these, these women, help us with the idea, we kept saying, we're not sure that they've got the doctors of this educators have the right idea.
Paul Taylor 13:33
These women gave us the courage to sort of step forward with that tried to use your term. And sort of define what we wanted to do with Mark, as opposed to what others would do with Mark. And I think that's one of the lessons we learn, which came a little bit later, but started there is to be an advocate for your child. Yeah, only only you can advocate for your child in the truest sense, because you know, what that child needs or what you would desire for that child. And many times it's in conflict with school, or doctors are whatever else and you have to be an advocate for your child. No, and
Tamara Anderson 14:17
I think you've hit upon something really big here, that I think every parent is an advocate for their child, whether they have disability or not. But when they have these special needs, it's especially important to stand up and stand beside your child and find what's right for them. And I know that you had quite a battle in front of you. Why don't you share a little bit of that and how Mark was able to then influence more than just your family. His influenced began to spread and it changed almost an entire school district, right?
Paul Taylor 14:53
It did and I can tell you a story after the fact but we lived in had the suburbs of Chicago and it was one of the larger school districts. And at the time Mark was that age. Children are not in the regular classroom, or whatever term you want to use, but they had a special education situation, they would bus him there. And we didn't want that. And so we basically felt the law was on our side. And we then started IEP meetings and meetings and meetings and meetings and a growing cadre of people on both sides, those who were supportive of our position.
Paul Taylor 15:36
And basically some people in the school district, the school administration, the school teachers, who were less desirable for what we were trying to accomplish. And it was a battle, literally a battle for a couple of years. And eventually, I had lost my job in that area. And we needed to move. And just prior to moving some of the people who had been vociferous in their in their opposition to what we are trying to do, basically said to Paul and Susan, and I'm paraphrasing, we apologize for the issues on the front end, but you are right. Mark has indeed changed this school. And he has opened up doors that we never would have thought possible. And so thank you for what you did.
Paul Taylor 16:32
Fast forward. We live in Eagle, Idaho. And a couple of years ago, I was at one of his baseball games, kind of a Special Olympics baseball game. And I was sitting in the stands and a woman who I didn't recognize came and sat down next next to me with the people that she was visiting. And I asked her where she was from, and she told me what suburban Chicago she was from. And I said, Well, we used to live there. And I said, What do you do? She said, I'm a school teacher. And then she went on to tell me a little bit about how well respected that school district years for the treatment of children with disabilities. And I thought, wow, it started.
Tamara Anderson 17:14
It started with that young man out there in that baseball field right now.
Paul Taylor 17:18
It did, but it also started with those women, because we would have not been able to do that had those that tribe, those women inspired us to do what we did.
Tamara Anderson 17:31
It's interesting that they probably started out just where you did, you know, maybe figuratively on a closet floor just weeping. And yet, in just a few years, they became the inspiration that helped you change in and, you know, plant the seed that changed an entire school districts view on special education. You know, what, what an amazing impact. So I guess one of the big lessons to learn from here is don't underestimate the power of God and helping you become the type of person who can make amazing changes or that your child who can impact your child to make amazing changes. You know,
Paul Taylor 18:16
I would agree with that, that sometimes it's not very easy. Either the expression endure to the end and whatever else. But yeah, and sometimes if we can then look back two years, three years, four years, and in this case, you know, almost 25 years, or whatever I was when I had the experience with a woman here and Eagle looking back to say, wow, you know, the scars of those years are not so significant anymore. They're minor in terms of eternity. But who knows what other how many other people have been influenced for good because of that experience? And I know we're not the only ones mean, everybody. You okay, what you're doing right now and with your children, your sons are the same thing. And there are many others who deal with circumstances that you don't want to deal with that benefit others in the long run. Yeah,
Tamara Anderson 19:15
Absolutely. So I guess sometimes we have to just be brave and courageous and move forward with faith. Right? That that God is going to make it this it says in Romans all turnout for our good.
Paul Taylor 19:29
You know, again, going back to quoting some of the people in the church vise was you have to take one step into the darkness. Before you're able to see the light sometimes you can't see the full lightness of the road ahead of you. You have to have faith to take a step into the darkness. And that to me is as an important, an important lesson that it's only once you get into the darkness that you can begin to eventually move to the light.
Tamara Anderson 19:59
Oh And that is scary. Do you know what I mean? It is always scary to take that step into the darkness. And you, in your mind, it's like, you know, God has it, but your soul is just like freaking out.
Paul Taylor 20:16
I agree. And there are some times when I should have stepped into the darkness, and I didn't. And I look back at my life and realize that I made the wrong decision. Um, other times I have stepped into the darkness, and I can see that the benefit, but I acknowledge that there are some times I didn't step into the darkness when I should.
Tamara Anderson 20:37
You know, I've, I've, I've started looking at that in my own life as well, Paul, sometimes it takes me longer to step into the darkness. And I'm thankful God's with me on that journey, wherever I am, whether I'm fast, or whether I'm slow or cautious that he's with me on that path, and he's gonna say, he's gonna stand by me, even if I'm not fast. Even if I'm more of the tortoise instead of the hare, you know, that? He's, he's like, okay, Tamra, you got this. And if it takes a month, or if it takes two years, he's with me. And I And I'm thankful that he's patient with me, because I'm doing things at my own pace. And maybe I'm not as fast as I have liked to be in my mind. Or I think I should be in my mind, you know, but but he's, he's like, it's okay, I've got this, keep going, keep trying.
Tamara Anderson 21:36
And I, the older I get, the more I realized that I need to quit beating myself up for not being faster. Maybe it processing some emotions, or maybe I'm not faster at being courageously stepping into the darkness. Because God knew that when he told me step into the darkness, and he knew it was going to take me longer than perhaps I thought it should. And so to be give myself a little grace, that I'm on my own journey, and it's gonna take me longer sometimes, you know,
Paul Taylor 22:09
a little bit related to that, in my own mind when I was younger, and I probably still do at times now. But when I was younger, I sort of added up the negative experiences in my life and the positive experiences in my life and sort of some of them and made a judgment about my life at that point in time. But I've had enough experiences now to see that those so called negative experiences, like Mark, I mean, this whole thing with Mark when I first, you know, to see the benefit. And so what I've come to realize, Tamara, at least in my own life is that life is not a summation of good and bad. It's a picture that you slowly build over time. And that some of those negative experiences when you stepped into the dark, actually are the threads are the mosaic are the tiles that tie something together later in your life.
Paul Taylor 23:06
So I no longer try to look at pluses and minuses, I tried to look at my life more in totality. And I see the relationship between times when I stepped into the darkness, and see where that led me to have something beneficial in my life or my children's life. And then as I said, I look back and regret some times, what did I miss? What did I not get prepared for back and such and such a time when I could have made a different decision? So anyway, I tried to look at my life a little bit more this in totality, as opposed to simply a linear or a summation of individual events.
Tamara Anderson 23:49
And that's wisdom, right there. may say, wisdom is experience applied or something like that. I think you're right, that the longer we're alive, the more we can kind of step back and see the pattern and how God had his fingers in all of it and was leading us and guiding us. Okay, well, when you're ready. Take that step. And don't worry, it will all work out. And of course, we don't know what all workout is going to mean.
Paul Taylor 24:20
That's yeah, that if we knew that,
Tamara Anderson 24:24
yeah. You know, you had an interesting experience where you didn't know how it was going to work out when you went snowmobiling. Would you mind sharing that story?
Paul Taylor 24:35
Well, it was a winter camp out with Mark for Boy Scouts. And this is when we lived in the Seattle area. And we were going to dig snow caves. This was up in Mount Baker national forests which is in North northern Washington state. And so I forget they're probably eight or nine scouts and I think For adult man, and we had practice with snowshoes and everything else. And so we left on a Thursday morning, there was a school break. So we left them that Thursday morning to go Thursday, Friday and Saturday.
Paul Taylor 25:12
And once we arrived at the area, it became clear, it was beautiful. It'd be the freshly fallen snow on the beautiful sunlight, all those kinds of things very, very poetic looking. But turn later into something, it's really die hard, scary. Anyway, it became clear that Mark could not snowshoe very well. And so they, they took his pack and snowshoes and he and I trudged up the mountain waiting for them. And so after a while, I was beginning to be physically exhausted, helping him through the snow because there were no trails we were simply on.
Paul Taylor 25:53
And so the first lesson for me on perhaps the most spiritual experiences of my life occurred when I sat down on a tree with him. And the the home, footprints in the sand came to my mind. As I sat there, I had the realization that that that poem, where there are two people, two sets of footprints in the sand, and one of the people who, who is with the Savior wonders why, at some point in time, there's only a single set of footprints in the Sabir lovingly tells him that I was carrying you at that time. overpowered me, I was trying to do for Mark, what the Savior was doing in that poem. And it just overwhelmed me with love with me for my son Mark, but also Heavenly Father for me. And so I was in that kind of state of mind. And we then we literally had to continue on because we had to catch up with the rest of them.
Paul Taylor 27:01
While we were, we had lunch, and then we were, in essence, building a snow cave, and Mark and I and another man were in this cave, and we were under several feet of snow. And we're in there, and it collapsed on us. And I thought I was going to die. I have no idea how long but I know what it's like now to be buried in an avalanche. And you we eventually got out of there. And to get to the point where you're really asking that at that point in time, we had to dig another snow cave. And so that night, as I was laying there, I kept thinking to myself, I have to protect Mark, I have to get Mark home. Another wave overpowered me more powerful than even the first one on the trail of, of a Father's Divine Love Tamara, I cannot describe it in words that were it was so powerful and peaceful.
Paul Taylor 28:04
At the same time. It just, I just cried, I was in this snow cave, crying and crying, because I felt this love for my son Mark. And then another wave came over which basically the roles reversed and I was now the son and sort of figured really speaking and Heavenly Father was saying to me, I'm going to get Paul home, I'm going to get Paul safely through the night. Those three separate ways of experiencing divine love and the relationship between fathers and son or parents to children. Again, I cannot Words fail me. But they were the most powerful spiritual experiences in my life to know of divine love, and what it will be like Sunday to feel that again,
Tamara Anderson 28:57
to know that God loves you so much, and that he is looking out for your best interest. Right. And not only that, but he's also looking out for your son's best interests, right?
Paul Taylor 29:08
I mean, really, I literally thought we were going to die when that all caved in on us. And so I think all of that physical exertion, that physical fear set the stage. Again, these are the bad things set the stage for me to feel those three rounds of divine love had I not had the physical exertion had I not had the fear of death and all of those kinds of things. I don't think I would have been prepared to feel to the degree that it did to the magnitude that I did that loved that the father shared with me.
Tamara Anderson 29:45
That is a powerful concept. It's interesting as I think back on my life, the hardest moments often have precipitated the biggest blessings and so I guess what I would say to anybody in a hard time right now is
Tamara Anderson 30:03
we're gonna take a quick break. But when we get back, we'll have more lessons, tips and things you can apply to your life. Stay tuned.
Tamara Anderson 30:11
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Tamara Anderson 31:36
What I would say to anybody in a hard time right now is if you're struggling physically, if you're struggling emotionally, if you're however you're struggling, that God is with you. And watch for the compensating blessing coming because of the trial challenge.
Paul Taylor 31:57
Richard G. Scott gave a talk once called trusting God. And there's a line to that, I'll paraphrase it say that the father and the son don't require any more difficulty in my life that is absolutely necessary for my eternal exultation or for those that I love. So that kind of goes along with the way you're just saying, sometimes they go, Well, why do I have to experience all that when somebody else is not? But But again, as I look at my life, the father and son are saying, Paul, these are experiences that you need. And I think sometimes if we're asked to trade our life situation with somebody else, we think initially that we might, but I think ultimately when the decision comes down, we would probably say no. And most I think most most of us would probably say, No, I'll keep what I have.
Tamara Anderson 32:54
Yeah, I think I've heard it said that trials are tailor made, you know, and
Paul Taylor 32:59
in my life, I can say that with no pun intended.
Tamara Anderson 33:03
I noticed that your last name is Taylor, I was actually thinking that. But it's interesting how those most difficult things really do change our perspective, if we let it because I know that trials can also have they can have a softening effect towards God. But they can also have kind of a building a wall with you know it, it's a hardening effect, almost. And so we get to choose how we, how we approach that trial? Are we going to let it soften us? Are we going to let anger and bitterness take over because it ultimately is a choice. And I know that there's times that I've started out super angry, and God has patiently worked with me to calm me down and work through that anger and get rid of it and move towards becoming more soft hearted again.
Paul Taylor 33:55
Yeah, Susan and I have had two different times in our life, we're in essence, Mark was one we have a daughter Sarah, who faced Life and Death circumstances and we had to make a choice. Do we do we sort of submit to a heavenly will kind of like Abraham, or do we not? And I can say that we got to the point with the Spirit's help that we could submit to whatever was going to happen and accept whatever was going to happen.
Paul Taylor 34:29
And in Mark's case, he survived open heart surgery. And our daughter Sarah's life, we had an experience early in her life where she was spared and later on when she died from a brain tumor. So I I can well relate to what you were just saying sometimes, depending upon our feelings, how we actually sort of accept the circumstances and go forward with a with a more thankful heart as opposed to being bitter, I can see how it's very easy to be bitter at times, especially when it comes to your children and their health and life and death circumstances.
Tamara Anderson 35:10
Would you mind telling me a little bit of Sarah's story? Because sometimes we get the miracles like you say that we're looking for, and sometimes we don't. And how did that come to be in your life? How did how were you able to submit even when it was something like she's gonna die? Yeah.
Paul Taylor 35:29
Well, to put it in perspective, when we were in the Seattle area, and I was getting ready to go down to graduate school, and while we were traveling, Sarab, we were in the U haul truck, and whatever else, and she became ill. And to make a long story very, very short, we had to stop in Burley Idaho because she was having difficulty breathing. It transported her back to Twin Falls, Idaho, and she spent a week in intensive care. She survived and we were grateful for that. And as we were leaving, one of the doctors said, we wanted want you to know that a force beyond us restored your daughter to life. Well, okay, I'm, we're happy she gotta get to graduate school, you know, on.
Paul Taylor 36:18
But about a year and a half, two years later, Susan, I Sarah and her oldest son, Adam, we're having a discussion, totally unrelated to what Sarah had experienced. And she's sort of stopped this, and wanted to know why we had prayed so hard. And we said, what you're talking about? Why did you pray so hard to bring me back? And we thought what you know, and she said, it was very nice over there.
Tamara Anderson 36:46
Oh,
Paul Taylor 36:47
and so, sorry for the motion. But that put in perspective, what the doctor said, a force beyond us restored your daughter to life. Fast forward to she's in her mid 20s. She develops a brain tumor. And she, she passes away about three years later. And so in those two situations, one where life was truly literally restored. And another one where it wasn't. Yet we did all praying and fast, and all kinds of things that people in faith do to help call down heavenly blessings. It was her time to go.
Paul Taylor 37:37
And we had to basically accept the fact that even though we wanted her to stay, her husband wanted her to stay. It was her time to go when we had to have that same wrestle again, could we voluntarily, spiritually, play Sara on the altar, like Abraham, and accept whatever was going to be. And so again, a comfort came over us during that period of time. But also, I think we are a little bit I don't want to say neat, but maybe in with one child, we've seen where life was restored through faith and prayers, and all of those kinds of things. On the other hand, the same things were done. But life in this case was called home. So it's not always faith and prayer is going to bring the result that you were hoping for, but faith and prayer hopefully gives you the courage and the faith really, and the trust in God to go forward. Irrespective of the results.
Tamara Anderson 38:43
Wow, that is such a powerful experience. And it's interesting that you had it with her twice, but but maybe the first time prepared you for the second time. You know what I mean? It gave me a foundation.
Paul Taylor 38:55
I really believe that it helped. I don't want to die. But having watched Sarah, I'm, I'm less afraid of death. I watched her struggle for three years. The first year and a half, two years it looked like she was going to you know, win the battle for a while, or at least lengthen that lengthen the battle. And then the last year was I watched her slowly, slowly slowly lose the battle. But she did it with such faith and she inspired far more people in her final year or two. It was unbelievable to me. How many people's lives she touched by watching her through that struggle. And so I realized then that God is in charge as we've been talking about. He sets the timetable when it comes to life and death. And that I'm less afraid of dying having watch Sarah.
Tamara Anderson 39:55
I like what she said it was nice over there.
Paul Taylor 39:59
Oh They just stunned us when she said that.
Tamara Anderson 40:03
That's very sweet. And I think it it also gives us hope for the resurrection for that time after we die, when we'll be with family, we won't be separated from them. And it'll be nice over there.
Paul Taylor 40:18
If I could, you know, kind of combining the experience I just talked about, with my experience in the snow cave of feeling Divine Love. Sounds a little bit facetious. But in a way, if I could transport myself right now, to that existence, or that realm, or that feeling, I would leave in a minute. Because to be associated again, with those that I love, and to feel the divine love from a father in heaven, His Son, why am I hanging around here?
Tamara Anderson 40:53
Because we have more to learn, I think.
Paul Taylor 40:57
I agree.
Tamara Anderson 40:58
While we're here, we've got to just keep pushing forward and doing our best and working through our problems with God's help. Someday, we will go wall go home, and we will feel God's love for us. Now, what Bible verse have you had that has become especially meaningful to you? As you've gone through these challenges in life?
Paul Taylor 41:22
There are actually many scriptures Tamara, but I guess one that maybe is the shortest is in Psalm that says, Be still and know that I am God, and I think it is 46:10, those few words, okay, have been a lesson to me saying, Paul, be still calm down. And again, as I've indicated before, sometimes I was not in a position or desiring to be still or know that he was gone. But I have been able to look back at times then in some of those experiences. And so I think I'm a little bit better than when I was younger, that when I'm in a difficult circumstance, now, I still try to push forward, there may be discouragement and so forth. But I've had enough experiences now in my life, looking back to say, okay, maybe I can trust Heavenly Father, in this circumstances, like I did in that one, and that one and that one, and helped me to get through it.
Tamara Anderson 42:23
Mm hmm. Yeah, well, we all do, right. It's, it's easy to be still when life is still and calm. Those moments when it's not, so still and calm when God is reminding you and you're just like, it's really hard to be still right now, God, it's really hard to trust you right now. Because my daughter is dying, you know, or, yeah, or my son is struggling. And I've got to work through these challenges. So it is a perfect verse to remember. And, and I love how you, you pointed out that remembering is been another key thing to help you be still remembering that well, God got me through that situation, right? He's not going to suddenly forget me and leave me alone in this one. And trusting that, so remember,
Paul Taylor 43:16
I think that's important. What you just said. Yeah, absolutely. During that period of time, when Sarah was experiencing what she was experiencing, I lost my job in Seattle. That was one other time, okay. I lost a lot of money. And so we found ourselves in St. George, where my in laws live, because we'd sold our house as long as we were in suitcases. So we had to park ourselves for a while. So we parked ourselves in St. George, and after we'd been there a couple of weeks as when Sarah has brain tumors diagnosed. So we spent sort of two years down there. And Daniel and Mark and Daniel, our youngest son, went down there.
Paul Taylor 44:03
And unbeknownst to me what future events would happen? Daniel has subsequently told me that that was some of the happiest times of his youth when I was just overwhelmed. And for about a three month period of time, I took him to the Dixie college down there for a once a week computer class. He has subsequently told me that that's what started him on his career. And he's very, very successful in that he's one of those high tech companies and down in Utah right now, but I guess where I'm going with that one, that's a real world example to me that my son has explained that he knew how terrible things were going for us was Sarah and my job and the money betta all of that kind of stuff. But for him, that was a seminal event for his career path. I'm going Thank you for sharing that. With Daniel, thank you for sharing that, because that gives me makes me feel a little bit better. Yeah, that what we were experiencing during that time?
Tamara Anderson 45:11
Yeah, well, and it kind of goes back to that comment. You said at the very beginning that it's not always just about us, right? No, not about me. Sometimes it's about those who have stewardship over our children, or they need something from that, you know that that situation took you to St. George, where he was able to take that computer class, which impacted the rest of
Paul Taylor 45:37
ya, that's one of those mosaics or threads
Tamara Anderson 45:41
that you don't see till years later. Now, I know that there's going to be people who are going to want to read your book, and I have to just do a quick plug for Paul's book mark and me, it is the sweetest story of just instances, he just plucks out of Mark's life where Mark has taught him a lesson or he's interacted with other people or challenges, things to laugh about. And honestly, I was having a morning where I was kind of feeling a little down inside, I picked up your book, and I couldn't put it down. I was like, this is the sweetest, bestest book. So if you're having one of those days, where you just need to sit back and enjoy a few stories. And and they're beautifully written. And because it's part of Mark's story, you just come to love mark, even though I've never met Mark, I love mark, you know what I mean? So tell us where we can find your book, Mark and Me.
Paul Taylor 46:42
well, I guess the easiest place Tamara is there's several places but I guess you could go to Amazon. It's an e book. It's in paperback. And it's in hardback. The book has about 80, little over 80 short stories, vignettes of what Mark has taught me, and what he's taught others. And so it is one of those things where you can read a page or two, or you can read the whole book.
Tamara Anderson 47:08
So yeah, and feel inspired. And so I just have to say, thank you so much for coming on for sharing little bits of your story. I know we couldn't dive in super deep, but that's what the book is for. Right? Before we close, will you please share with us how people can find you and connect with you.
Paul Taylor 47:30
There is a website, Paul Taylor author.com. I do have a Facebook account, same thing, Paul Taylor, author, and Instagram, Paul Taylor, author. But I'm just my kids are great on those. But they're all sorts of new experiences for me, Tamara,
Tamara Anderson 47:47
are you saying mark is better at Facebook than you?
Paul Taylor 47:50
Yes, he is. just amazed. And some people tell me they're on Facebook primarily be because of Mark, I think. But yeah, he's, I can go on to my Facebook account. And see people who have commented on Mark's Facebook account. And there's just numbers and numbers and numbers of people who are commenting because Mark has commented, he's much better than I am.
Tamara Anderson 48:20
That is so fun. And that's amazing. But thank you for sharing sharing your story and also for being willing to share those experiences with Mark in your book, because they will continue to impact people. And he will continue to impact people. And I guess I think you mentioned this in the book that the power and influence of one life, you know, that one person can have? You just have no idea, right?
Paul Taylor 48:47
That is come to fruition so many times over those with those mothers back in Chicago. That I would say there's no doubt in my mind that Mark has influenced far more people for good in this life that I have or Susan has or Susan and I combined. And Mark is not the only one. He has peers, your sons. They just they have a gift. Okay? That's divide in my mind. It is a divine gift. And he Mark has a Facebook account. Here's a young man with Down Syndrome and he has over 800 friends on Facebook. I'm going on why? The Lord blessed me with a great son is Mark. I have two other wonderful sons, three other wonderful daughters. But he gave me a son with unique gifts.
Tamara Anderson 49:46
And I think that's one of the other blessings that God has blessed you with is that unique perspective of of course God sees everything Mark can and will do and become Um, but he's blessed you with a father's perspective and love to see your son grow and progress beyond what people ever thought he would originally do and become right.
Paul Taylor 50:15
Not only what they but what I. Yeah, I mean, it was learning for me to see, Holy mackerel, I mean, I'm we're looking back in time saying that, look what he has accomplished in his life compared to where I first saw him, or thought of him on the closet floor 30 some odd years ago. It's been quite a journey
Tamara Anderson 50:37
it has, so don't give up hope, and trust that God's got this have faith. Be still. You've given us some amazing lessons, my goodness. Well, thank you, Paul, this has been an honor to have you on today. Thank you for sharing, especially those tender moments when life was hard. And you felt God's love? Because I think that can get us through just about anything.
Paul Taylor 51:01
No. Well, thank you. And I appreciate the opportunity to be on this format. You've got quite a following. It's really been a privilege for me, to be honest with you. So thank you.
Tamara Anderson 51:12
Hey, thanks so much for listening to today's show. If you like what you heard, subscribe so you can get your weekly dose of powerful stories of hope. I know there are many of you out there who are going through a hard time, and I hope you found useful things that you can apply to your own life in today's podcast. If you'd like to access the show notes of today's show, please visit my website stories of hope podcast.com. There you will find a summary of today's show, the transcript and one of my favorite takeaways. You know, if someone kept coming to mind during today's episode, perhaps that means that you should share this episode with them. Maybe there was a story shared or quote, or a scripture verse that they really, really need to hear. So go ahead and share this podcast. May God bless you, especially if you're struggling with hope to carry on and have the strength to keep going. When things get tough. Remember to walk with Christ and He will help you bear the burden. And above all else, remember, God loves you.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai