Liz Kazandzhy: Finding Peace When Worried About Ukranian Family
Liz Kazandzhy has been so worried about her family in the Ukraine. She shares some of God’s powerful lessons to her since the war began and how she’s been able to find moments of peace.
Episode Discussion Points
A funny story about making brownies
Her personal connection to the Ukraine, serving a volunteer mission there
How she ended up marrying a man from the Ukraine and how his family still lives there
The feeling of shock when the invasion first happened
How dealing with anxiety and the stressors of war have been a challenge for her
Experiencing grief, sorrow, anger, as well as peace and hope
Encouraging their family in Ukraine to get out of Kiev
How she and her husband attend church with a Russian speaking congregation with people from the Ukraine and what their pastor said that has helped their congregation focus on unity.
What Russians and Ukrainians together in a church congregation taught her about being strong.
How the Holy Ghost can bring peace even in times of strife
Anxiety tip—imagining the worst case scenario and then finding God in it (ex: those who have died have gone to God and they are home).
God understands each person’s worries, fears and what is going on in their lives.
It brings her peace to know God is with them.
How Liz has tried to put God and her family as a priority even when she constantly wants to be checking the news and checking on her family in the Ukraine.
The blessings of putting God first
The importance of learning to live in the moment because you never know how long you will have with people here on earth.
Don’t let other things distract you from things that matter most.
When she couldn’t focus because she was so preoccupied with the war.
The ah-ha she had when she was reading that the Russians were “occupying” the Ukraine.
How the Ukranians defending their lands and freedom has become symbolic to her for the battle going on in her mind—battling back despair and depression with faith, hope, light and love.
Battling fear with faith
Favorite Bible Verse
Isaiah 41:10, “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.”
Connect with Liz
#tamarakanderson #storiesofhopeinhardtimes #podcast #hope #God #hardtimes #war #UkraineWar #Family #battles #peace #comfort #holyghost #Spirit #prayer #mentalbattles #depression#anxiety
Transcription
You can find the transcription of today's episode here:
Liz Kazandzhy 0:02
The Ukrainian resistance has actually become a very powerful symbol for me. And I've kind of related that to myself, picturing my mind as a battlefield, and that these thoughts of depression and despair and anger, trying to get inside. But I want to be like those Ukrainians and I want to drive those out with faith and hope and light and love.
Tamara Anderson 0:36
Welcome to Stories of Hope in Hard Times, the show that explores how people endure and even thrive in difficult times, all with God's help. I'm your host Tamara K Anderson. Join me on a journey to find inspiring stories of hope and wisdom learned in life's hardest moments.
Tamara Anderson 1:01
My guest today is the author of the Holy Ghost from A to Z, and the host of the podcast Latter Day Saint Book Nook where she pulls religious insights from books of all genres. She enjoys writing and speaking about gospel topics in a way that's clear and focused on personal application. She graduated from Brigham Young University with a degree in Human Development and is now using that degree to develop three of her own little humans with her husband Vlod. They currently live in Utah, I am pleased to present Liz Kazandzhy. Liz, are you ready to share your story of hope?
Liz Kazandzhy 1:39
Yes,
Tamara Anderson 1:40
Liz, we are so excited to have you on today's podcast. And just to break the ice. I hear you have a funny story about making brownies.
Liz Kazandzhy 1:49
Yes. So um, when I was a teenager, about 17 years old, I wanted to make some brownies for some people, you know, do a nice thing. But I was totally inept at anything cooking related. Oh, no, no, I thought, you know, I would branch out and do this. So I drove to the store and I got the brownie mix. And I came home and I was so proud of you, you know, do everything by myself. And so I read the instructions. And I got to the point where it said, grease only the bottom of the pan. And I think it was the word only that threw me off. Because I'm like, if I Grease the bottom, it could get on the sides. And that must not be what it means. And so I greased the bottom, like the actual underside, other side bottom of the pan for for two batches before I realized that's not what you do. So I joke that the brownies stuck to the pan, but that pans slid right out of the oven.
Tamara Anderson 2:55
Oh my goodness, that is that is awesome. You know, Life is funny that way. And we have learning experiences along the way that help us learn things sometimes the easy way and sometimes the hard way, right. Oh, that is so fun.
Tamara Anderson 3:14
I am so excited to have Liz on. Because one of the amazing things about Liz as she has this really interesting connection to the Ukraine. And I thought with everything going on over in the Ukraine right now, it would be interesting to have her come on and share her experiences, how she grew to love their Ukraine and how she has a really personal connection with it now, so that you guys can get a picture of that. And then how God is helping her through all the stuff that's happening right now. Liz, why don't you take us back to your introduction to the Ukraine and how it evolved?
Liz Kazandzhy 3:51
Yeah, so I was in Ukraine in 2013 and 2014 as a volunteer for about a year and a half. I was actually there the first time Russia came and took the Crimea.
Tamara Anderson 4:06
Wow.
Liz Kazandzhy 4:07
So kind of flashback then. But after my mission, I got in touch with a man that I knew there. And we started talking and video chatting and fell in love. And he came to the States and we got married. So that was about seven years ago.
Tamara Anderson 4:27
Wow.
Liz Kazandzhy 4:29
And so we have three kids. And we obviously keep in touch with Ukraine because his family is still there--So his mom and his sister. And we actually went and visited in October. So we were there just less than six months ago.
Tamara Anderson 4:46
Wow. Wow. So talk me through how the recent events and the invasion of Russia into the Ukraine has impacted you and your family. And and just the emotions that you've been experiencing?
Liz Kazandzhy 5:02
Yeah, it's been hard. It's been very hard. The first few days, actually, probably the first week and a half. I think we're all just in shock of what was happening. And I was just so glued to my phone for me to watch the news and knowing of my family and my friends that are there. And even like, reaching out and messaging, like, are you still there? Have you left? How are things? And I also have anxiety, postpartum anxiety. And turns out the anxiety plus, war is not a very good combination.
Tamara Anderson 5:47
I can only imagine. Oh, my goodness. Yeah.
Liz Kazandzhy 5:50
So it's been. Yeah, and I've gone through, I mean, the shock of it, and then just the, the sorrow, randomly crying on and off when I think about what's happening. I've gone through the anger of, you know, anger at the people that are doing this and anger, the people that aren't helping as much as I wish they would be. And, thankfully, I've also had some things that have brought me more peace and hope. But I've definitely been way, way up and down through it all, because it is so personal to me.
Tamara Anderson 6:28
Oh, yeah. So give me an update on your family over there. Where are they right now? Have they are have they been able to move? Relocate? Are they safe?
Liz Kazandzhy 6:38
Yes. So. So they were in Kiev for the first week and a half of the war. And we were hoping we were kind of encouraging them to leave. But to leave your home is not an easy thing to do. You know, you want to you want to stay where it's comfortable, where, where, you know, people and things and everything. But finally, they just realized that they needed to leave. And so they, you know, got a ride to train station, got on a train headed to Western Ukraine. And so now they're in a in a city in western Ukraine, where it's safer for now. And then if they need to move from there, they'll probably go more west to Poland and Europe and so forth. But when they left it was it was a huge relief. Just to I mean, even though I still have friends and people I know there to just know that my, my children's grandma and aunt are safe. That made that made a big difference.
Tamara Anderson 7:41
Oh, yeah, absolutely. So what have you heard from them? As far as their reaction to it? Have they been going through the same ups and downs you have? What are the emotions that they have been expressing to you?
Liz Kazandzhy 7:59
Yeah, the the same thing, the shock and the sorrow and anger, basically, everything I'm feeling but to a greater degree, because they're there. We've tried to not be too pushy with asking for updates. There was a time where I would be like, how are you doing? Where are you? Like, I mean, the first few days it was almost like, are you alive? You know, it was that bad. But I've kind of given them more space to let them focus on you know, what they're doing and then now now that they're away, kind of letting them relax and but we do we video chat with him often. In fact, after this interview, I'm gonna go home and we're going to talk to them. And it's always great to see them and we kind of cheer them up with our, our little kids that they get to see on the
Tamara Anderson 8:49
And the antics. Right little children always bring joy, don't they?
Liz Kazandzhy 8:54
Yeah, but it's interesting there. We go to church with a Russian speaking congregation.
Tamara Anderson 9:02
Really?
Liz Kazandzhy 9:03
Yeah. So in our area, the Salt Lake area, there's actually a pretty large Russian speaking population. And that includes from Russia, from Ukraine from other countries. And I remember I remember the second Sunday that the war was going on. And I just I went to church was such a heavy heart because that was when you that was when things got really bad. Like the first Sunday, we were still like, what's going on? And what's this gonna mean? But the second Sunday, like things were really bad by then. And I remember going there with just this heavy heart, but then seeing these other people like seeing these Ukrainians who this is happening to their homeland, and they have friends and they have family there.
Liz Kazandzhy 10:01
And there's some people who can't even get a hold of their loved ones because of what's happening. And I just started to cry. But then I realized, like, these people are here, like, they aren't sitting at home cursing God, they're at church. They're praying and singing and worshiping and supporting each other. And I just thought, you know, if they can be that strong, I can be strong, too.
Tamara Anderson 10:35
Wow, that is beautiful. And so you have members in your congregation who are both from Russia and from the Ukraine, and they are interacting in a good way. Is that what a boils down to.
Liz Kazandzhy 10:52
Yes, yeah. And the first time that we met are the leader of our congregation kind of gave a sermon on unity, and also kind of keeping politics out of the the church building to, I guess, to preempt any conflicts that may arise. But from what I've seen there, there haven't been, you know, those those types of things. There's just been unity and love and support, no matter where they're from.
Tamara Anderson 11:25
Wow, you know, what, what impresses me the most about that, Liz, is that the gospel of Jesus Christ can unite people of all different races, religions, countries, it doesn't matter, that it can unite all of us. And I just find this example of your congregation so inspiring, that they can just say, Okay, our countries are at war, but we are one of heart united in Christ.
Tamara Anderson 11:56
And I think that is so powerful and so beautiful that, that Jesus Christ can do that to people with differences, that He can heal them. But I think you have to be open to it, right?
Liz Kazandzhy 12:09
Yeah.
Tamara Anderson 12:11
Oh, my goodness. Wow. So you, you have written this amazing book on The Holy Ghost from A to Z? What principle, I know, you have like 20 sec principles in there. What principle in there Do you have that that applies to this situation right here where the Holy Ghost is able to take people from perhaps opposing backgrounds or conflicting interests and unite them?
Liz Kazandzhy 12:43
I think that the most applicable one is peace, which is the chapter that starts with P It's the can bring you the Holy Ghost can bring you peace. And and thinking back to the last few weeks, I've felt that in a few different ways, kind of these. These like aha moments of how the spirit has brought me peace.
Liz Kazandzhy 13:09
When you have anxiety, you worry about all sorts of different things. Yeah. And one of the tricks that my one of the tricks that my sister taught me is to imagine the worst case scenario, because if you can be okay with the worst case scenario, then you can be okay with anything that might happen.
Liz Kazandzhy 13:27
And so I was thinking, Okay, what's the worst case scenario? And that's what's happening right now. It is the death and the destruction of what's happening in Ukraine. And I thought, okay, so the people that are dying, they are going home to their Maker, they are going to a better place. They are with God. And that was, you know, the worst case. And then there are other people who are still here, that they haven't lost their lives, but they've lost their homes and they've lost loved ones, and they've lost jobs and stability. And they've lost so much. But in that case, God is with them.
Liz Kazandzhy 14:16
And I just feel so much peace knowing that God understands their situation. He understands each person's heart, each person's worries, and fears, and everything that's going on in their lives. And I know that I can't help everyone you know, they're so far away. There's so many that are suffering, but it just brings me a lot of peace, to know that God is with them.
Tamara Anderson 14:42
That is so powerful. I love I love that. The way that you approach that that even in a worst case scenario and you imagine that in your mind, you think of how God can be with or comfort or help or he'll. And that's just a powerful image in your mind that you can apply in almost any situation right that you can find God in the worst moments and invite Him into those worst moments and then open yourself to that piece. Right?
Liz Kazandzhy 15:21
Yeah.
Tamara Anderson 15:22
Wow. Now I know this probably wasn't easy, spiritually, for you, you know, the ups and downs and emotions. And I think what's cool about inviting God and the Spirit into us is that He takes us where we are, if we're angry, it's okay. He loves us. And He knows we're experiencing that emotion of anger. If we're sad. He's okay. You know, we're going to experience that emotion of sorrow. And it's okay. And I'll bless you, and I'll strengthen you. And, and He'll take us with whatever emotions we come with. And bless us to be able to move forward as long as we're inviting Him in, and we can take that anger to Him and give it to Him. We can take that sorrow and give it to Him. We can take all those emotions and just--here you go. And pray for peace. Have you seen? Have you been able to do that these last few weeks?
Liz Kazandzhy 16:25
Yes, I have been able to do that. But it has required a conscious effort. Because my, my go to thing, like, when I first wake up in the morning, it's to check the news. You know, it's to check what happened in the last six to eight hours. But I've been trying really hard to, before I check the news to say a prayer. And before I throughout the day, when I'm thinking about what's happening in Ukraine or keeping up on it. I try to think about God, I try to, to think about scriptures that that bring me hope and try to just make that conscious effort to keep God in my life. Because He really does take those emotions and, and help me to handle them help me to, to deal with whatever I'm going through.
Tamara Anderson 17:24
That is a powerful principle, the putting God first concept, right? That even in a situation as dire as this, that we can make that choice. Okay, am I going to check the news first, or when you're gonna check in with God first? Right?
Tamara Anderson 17:40
And, and just making that conscious choice. He sees that, and He blesses you. And it's incredible how he's able to do that. And I don't know exactly how that works, but but I know that it does, because I've seen it in my own life, too. It's that conscious choice. Okay, even though all hell is breaking loose, I'm gonna put you first. And then I need your help. Right?
Liz Kazandzhy 18:06
Yeah, not not even just God, but also my family. Like, I will be trying to catch up on news and one of my kids will be, you know, pestering me wanting my attention. And it's like, what am I going to do? Am I gonna like shoo them away? So I could finish this news? Or am I gonna turn off the news and, and spend time with them and hold them close? Because people People in Ukraine are just having a hard such a hard time that I just want to do what I can for my own family here, to treasure those relationships that are so important, because you never know what's going to happen.
Tamara Anderson 18:49
Wow. That is a really good perspective that when we're in times of stress, don't forget to put first things first God, family, don't let the other things distract you from the things that matter most. And that's easier said than done in certain certain circumstances like this, you know, where you're worried about your family, and you're dealing with anxiety and stuff like that. But I love I love that principle. Live now live today, right?
Liz Kazandzhy 19:21
Yeah. And that reminds me of another thing that the Spirit taught me. One of the first few days. I think it was about the second or the third day, I was trying to get something done. And I just couldn't focus for the life of me. Because this was just so on my mind. And I thought, I just wish I wasn't so preoccupied. My mind is just so preoccupied. And then I stopped because that word occupied. I read the Russia I read the news in Russian, because it comes faster than in English because it's right there. And the word that they use for the Russians that There are 'occukuPonti', which is occupiers. And I just realized, just because Russia is trying to take over Ukraine doesn't mean that this war needs to take over my life. Like, I'm just those thoughts were just so occupying my mind.
Liz Kazandzhy 20:20
And so the Ukrainian resistance has actually become a very powerful symbol for me, because of the way that they are fighting back the way they are defending their lands and their freedom in their families. I mean, to the point of 1000s, and 1000s, of people signing up to fight, and people literally putting their bodies on the ground in front of armored vehicles, and people yelling at the Russian soldiers to go home. And just this, this powerful sense of defending their land. And I've kind of related that to myself, picturing my mind as a battlefield, and these thoughts of depression and despair, and anger, trying to get inside. But I want to be like those Ukrainians. And I want to drive those out with faith and hope and light and love and all of those things from God that will help us to get through this. And so just day after day, with a conscious effort, that's, that's what I try to do is just drive away those feelings like the Ukrainians are trying to drive away those occupiers
Tamara Anderson 21:42
Wow. And that's a battle that we each wage every day, the battle that happens right here in our own minds, what a powerful image that is, I love how you were how the Spirit taught you that right that here's how you this applies to you, Liz.
Liz Kazandzhy 21:59
That little, that little thought I had and then the the aha moment of that even just that simple word occupier or occupying? Wow,
Tamara Anderson 22:08
have you had any other spiritual thoughts that you'd like to share before we wrap it up?
Liz Kazandzhy 22:14
Maybe not a spiritual thought, but an invitation for people. There was this awesome quote that I heard a friend share, "I am only one. But still I am one. I cannot do everything. But still I can do something. And because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do." And when I read that, I think so many of us are feeling helpless. We are here in the States, we're so far away. We want to help our conscience is telling us to help. And sometimes we don't know how we feel that helplessness, that powerlessness. But it's helped me to feel empowered when I do the things that I can do.
Liz Kazandzhy 23:00
And I just want people to know, if you are feeling that helplessness, find a way that you can help because there are ways you can donate you can. There's probably some kind of volunteer opportunity in your community. I personally did a podcast episode about Ukraine, and just helping to make people aware and just doing those little things that I could do. That brought me a lot of peace. And I think those feelings of helplessness that that are so common, it's your conscience. But without a way to, you just haven't found a way to fulfill that yet. And if you're struggling to find that, you can always ask God to just ask God what you can do. And and he can help you know what steps you can take. Because you may just be one person, but the world is full of one person one by one. And together we can make a difference.
Tamara Anderson 24:01
Oh, I love that. And we can we can we can do little things. And I love how you said ask God what you can do. Because sometimes Prayer is a powerful thing. You know, praying for people. If you know someone over there, pray for them specifically by name. If you don't know someone over there personally, just pray for the people on both sides who are struggling, right? Yeah, that's powerful. Has there been a Bible verse that has become meaningful to you at this time of conflict?
Liz Kazandzhy 24:34
Yes, definitely. It's Isaiah 41:10. And that thing that I was saying about God is with the Ukrainians, this is what came to mind. The Lord says, "Fear thou not for I am with thee. Be not dismayed for I am thy God. I will strengthen thee, yea I will help the yea, I will uphold the by the right hand of my righteousness." And I I truly believe that that applies to Ukrainians right now. It applies to everybody, but especially to them and their situation right now.
Tamara Anderson 25:07
You know, I love how he says fear, though not. And then he speaks of faith. And I think that's one of the things I've been pondering in the scriptures, especially with everything going on is, am I going to let fear kind of like you were saying, overtake my mind? Or am I gonna let faith permeate my mind. And it is that constant battle, especially for those of us who struggle with anxiety, making that choice--I choose faith today, you know, and then battling for it, because it is a battle that we waged minute by minute in our minds. But that I love that choosing the the faith over the fear and and giving that to God, because it's too hard for us to do it on our own. Right, we need His help in those daily battles, in our mind, and in real life.
Tamara Anderson 26:00
Well, Liz, this has been so wonderful. I know there's going to be people who want to check out you and your podcast, where can they find you online? And, and also, tell us about your book that's now available for preorder?
Liz Kazandzhy 26:13
Yeah, so my podcast, podcast website is LDS booknook.com. And there, you can also find a link to my website, which is kind of hard, because I have to spell it out. But I'll spell it for you. So it's Liz Kazandzhy.com. And that last name is spelled KAZANDZHY. But again, you can probably just go to lbs book.com. And click the link,
Tamara Anderson 26:41
they're easier to find and easier to spell, right? Yes.
Liz Kazandzhy 26:45
And you can Google the Holy Ghost from A to Z. And you can find that on Amazon and some other places that you can preorder it. And that'll come in June. It's a book I wrote to help people feel the spirit more in their life, just these 26 ways. One way for each letter 26 ways that the Spirit can bless your life.
Tamara Anderson 27:09
I love that. And I'm so thankful you're able to share with us the letter P from that book, yes, in today's episode about how the Spirit brings us peace. And so thank you for sharing peace with us and for sharing these amazing lessons that the spirit has taught you as you have struggled with the anxiety. Watching your family in the Ukraine struggle, and may God bless you and your family will keep you in our prayers. Thank you.
Tamara Anderson 27:36
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Tamara Anderson 28:59
Hey, thanks so much for listening to today's show. If you like what you heard, subscribe so you can get your weekly dose of powerful stories of hope. I know there are many of you out there who are going through a hard time, and I hope you found useful things that you can apply to your own life in today's podcast. If you'd like to access the show notes of today's show, please visit my website stories of hope podcast.com. There you will find a summary of today's show, the transcript and one of my favorite takeaways. You know, if someone kept coming to mind during today's episode, perhaps that means that you should share this episode with them. Maybe there was a story shared or quote or a scripture verse that they really really need to hear. So go ahead and share this podcast. May God bless you, especially if you are struggling with hope to carry on and have the strength to keep going when things get tough. Remember to walk with Christ and He will help you bear the burden and above all else Remember God loves you.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai