Jeff & Sheldon: How to Make Habits that Actually Stick
Jeff Corrigan and Sheldon Mills of the Habit Masters/Idea Gym podcast are no strangers to setting and reaching goals. Today we talk about some of the key ingredients to making good habits stick which will change your life for the better.
Episode Discussion Points
The great white tiger Mohini’s story and how that applies to limiting beliefs that seem to hold us captive and stuck.
Jeff shares a story in his life where life got really hard and very busy, and he had to evaluate what habits were most important to keep him going.
Power in habits in keeping your momentum moving forward when we’re trying to push passed limiting beliefs
Jeff’s daily habits included: daily scripture study, journaling, listening to personal development books,
Jeff noticed the things being taught in the scriptures were the same things being taught in personal development books and he started wondering how he could apply these things in his life.
Jeff’s & his wife pushed forward searching for answers to her health challenges until wife was finally diagnosed with Hashimoto’s disease.
In order to help his wife manage her health, they have had a complete lifestyle change, especially with diet. These changes happened a little at a time, but their overall impact has helped them both become healthier.
How God helps us work through life, line upon line, one baby step at a time.
If not seeing progress, remember to be patient, then identify the end result/identity shift you are trying to make (instead of saying you want to lose 30 pounds realize the real goal is you want to live a healthier lifestyle).
“If you want to change your life, you have to change something you do daily.”—Sheldon
The power of having an accountability partner
We know we can get stuck in bad habits, now let’s shift that and get stuck in good habits.
One of the core fundamentals to developing a habit is a concept called
Decide who you want to be and prove it to yourself by small daily wins.
Don’t quit when you miss a day. Just keep going.
Core Fundamental Upper and Lower Limits.
This means establishing a maximum and a minimum you are going to do for a goal each day/week—not an all or nothing (because we inevitably don’t fulfill those).
Ex: Lower limit writing one sentence in my journal; Upper Limit—writing a 1-2 pages (but don’t overdo it—set a max).
"It’s not about getting there tomorrow, it is about progress each day.”—Jeff
The best routine is something you will actually do.
If you want to change the shape of your hour, change 10 minutes of that hour. If you want to change the shape of your day, change what you do this hour.
Favorite Bible Verse and Quotes
“Ships turned about with a very small helm.”—from James chapter 3
“The minutes and hours well-spent are the building blocks of a good life.” —Sheldon
Check out the Habit Master’s Course
Help you identify and clarify the person you want to become
Identify a very clear daily action step to get you there
6 Fundamentals checklist to help you build successful habits
Then you become a habit master, because you can repeat what you have learned over and over and reach your full potential.
Cost: $98, but that is for 2 people. You get to do it with a friend/accountability partner—
***BONUS, as my listeners, you get a 50% discount with this code: HABITS4TAMARA
Check it out at: IdeaGym.info or https://www.thehabitmasters.com/
#tamarakanderson #storiesofhopeinhardtimes #podcast #hope #God #hardtimes #habits #goals
Transcription
You can find the transcription of today's episode here:
Tamara Anderson 0:02
How many of you out there have ever started a new year and hit the ground running with your New Year's resolutions and then come up short because you weren't able to accomplish what you wanted? And you just kind of got discouraged and felt like, why am I even bothering? I just, I don't know what to do. I feel like giving up. And if you've ever felt that way, please know you're not alone.
Jeff Corrigan 0:35
Welcome to Stories of Hope and Hard Times, the show that explores how people endure and even thrive in difficult times, all with God's help. I'm your host Tamara K Anderson, join me on a journey to find inspiring stories of hope and wisdom learned in life's hardest moments.
Tamara Anderson 1:01
How many of you out there have ever started a new year and hit the ground running with your New Year's resolutions? And then come up short, I have brought on two of my friends today to talk about how we solve this crazy problem that I don't know about you, but that I seem to face every year I'm getting better at figuring everything out. But I thought I'd bring on Jeff Corrigan and Sheldon Mills. And these two friends of mine are the gurus behind the Idea Gym Podcast. And so they have spent years figuring out how you form habits that stick and how you really become who you want to become. And so we're going to talk a little bit today about this crazy conundrum. Thanks for coming on the show Jeff and Sheldon.
Sheldon Mills 1:57
Thanks for having us.
Jeff Corrigan 1:58
Yeah, we're glad to be here. This is awesome.
Tamara Anderson 2:00
So I thought we'd start off today a little bit talking about this idea of sometimes we have a hard time breaking out of the person we used to be and becoming better becoming our new cells. Because sometimes we have these limiting beliefs that keeps us stuck. And we want to become this new, better version of ourselves. But we seem paralyzed. Sometimes we're scared. I mean, deep down, maybe we don't realize why we're having a hard time breaking out. But but we're having these struggles to move forward powerfully and become a new, better version of ourselves. So Sheldon, I know you were talking that you had a story about a white tiger there.
Sheldon Mills 2:54
Yeah, this is a true story. You could go Google if you want spot a white tiger named Mohini. So background, it was in the 1960s. It was a gift to the children of America to President Eisenhower. And for years this this great white tiger and just a little bit like a white tigers genetic anomaly. So in nature, they're even bigger, stronger, would stick out. The king and queen in the forest. Right?
Sheldon Mills 3:22
And anyway, this this white tiger lived in the Washington Zoo for many years was the star attraction. And in this 12 by 12 foot cage, and would pace around, you know, just ferocious tiger, right. And there's been people wanting lobbying for a long time to make a big enclosure, you know, more natural and after fundraising and some money they construction to build this nice, beautiful habitat, where Mohini could go and run free and large, several acres worth, right. And just excited for this new life for Mohini and for the people.
Sheldon Mills 4:02
And almost immediately, when she was released into her new habitat, she went right to the very back corner about you know, the two sides, two walls meet paced off a 12 by 12 foot square, and almost never left it for the rest of her life.
Tamara Anderson 4:23
Wow.
Sheldon Mills 4:24
She no longer was stuck in this this physical cage but mentally she never could leave that ever. And I think all of us in some area of our life like that is that's us like these limiting beliefs. It's like these, these things that I think more often than not happened to us, right childhood trauma, stuff like that, that just like makes us mentally feel like we're in this this cage, but it's it's not true. Right? And so this course that Jeff and I have been working on for a long time now about building habits called Habit Masters have the art of building habits, right? It's trying to help people kind of see where they want to go. And then build the steps to to make those changes more often than not, it's always these mental habits we have to break right to achieve and become who they want to be.
Tamara Anderson 5:19
Yeah. So you know, what's so crazy is when I started podcasting, or when well, I wanted to start podcasting. And I'd done all the back work, I learned everything I needed to do want my microphone, done everything. And then when I went to get closer to pushing the Launch button, I found that I was like, hitting up against a brick wall. And I didn't know why I was like, I am scared to death to put myself out there. And I didn't know why. And I had to do like all this journaling about it, and praying about it. Because I was like, why am I so stuck, like, this is a good thing that I'm trying to do. It's a good thing I'm trying to come but I can't seem to get through this wall, kind of like Mohini, right.
Tamara Anderson 6:12
And I found that it kind of stemmed back to when I was young girl and I was bullied. And this is why I figured out by journaling about it. And that I was scared to put myself out there because I was afraid I'd be bullied again. And this is like sixth grade Tamara, do you know what I mean? So here's sixth grade Tamara is limiting the progress of 40-something-year-old, Tamara. It is crazy how those childhood things can really stop our progress. And so we set these goals and we're like, why can't I reach it? And sometimes it goes back to those limiting beliefs.
Tamara Anderson 6:55
And we have to kind of dive deep to figure out, Okay, what's stopping me? And, and what do I need to do to push past this? So Jeff, you were at a point in your life. And this kind of is the back story behind your Habit Masters course, where you were super busy. Your life, there were some health challenges going on, and your family. And life was just crazy and chaotic. And you started figuring out how to keep moving forward with some of the basics while you're going through hard times. And I think all of us, especially with this added stress of COVID going on for the last couple of years. We're dealing with more stress in our lives, and usually are and we're like, oh my gosh, setting goals. One more thing on top of everything else that I'm dealing with, like no, thank you, you know, I mean, I do want to be better. But sometimes it's one more thing. So tell us kind of the background here on on your story. And what what kind of laid the groundwork for what you guys have done here?
Jeff Corrigan 8:11
Well, it goes back just a little further than that. But I think that was that was a pivotal moment. So Sheldon, I met probably, but 11 years ago, and we were we were immediately kindred spirits. Like we just talked about all kinds of success ideas and what we wanted to do and who we wanted to become, and neither of us had really taken any action steps to get there at that point. I mean, all we had done is like talk and read, you know, we'd read some stuff and talk about it and, and we knew that eventually we needed to become like, we needed to be the doer. It's just like you were saying, like, we had to put ourselves out there and take the next step and be and while we got started in that path, I actually had an opportunity to become part owner in a business at the time, I was working nine to five and nine to five, I'd been working at a company for seven, eight years at the time, actually almost almost 10 years at the time.
Jeff Corrigan 9:03
And I had built up and done tons of stuff there. And it was actually one of it was it was a great place to be I learned a ton I had tons of opportunities. But I knew that I my dream had always been to become an entrepreneur and a business owner and that was my goal. So but hadn't really taken a lot of steps to get there other than just a few little attempts here and there. And about that time when I was making the transition. My wife was having our second baby and she after she had baby she just had all kinds of health issues and we couldn't figure out what was going on right and to the outside to the externally she looked fine.
Jeff Corrigan 9:40
Anybody who saw her, you would never know there wasn't any like obvious signs that she was struggling but you know sleepless nights and like things waking up being like spinning anxiety, sweats and just stuff she had never experienced before. And we couldn't figure out what it was we went to the doctor and they didn't really know and they said oh you're fine like all your you know they did their tests and said, Oh, yeah, everything was fine. Everybody kept telling her she was fine. But she knew she wasn't.
Jeff Corrigan 10:04
And that meanwhile I was, I was transitioning to this new role in another business. And while still working my nine to five, so I'd work my nine to five, and then three days a week, I'd work at night at the new business. So I was joining it is actually a jewelry store that I run with my brother now, but it had been around for a long time. So I was kind of jumping on learning the game, figuring out how to do that. And all the while I'm still working my nine to five, because that's what my main source of income was. And it was what all during this transition of we have a newborn baby, my wife struggling with this illness that we can't figure out what's going on.
Jeff Corrigan 10:40
And we were praying a lot, you know, I mean, it comes down to that, it's like, your habits really have to start to become like, okay, what are the things that I do almost automatically in my life that can keep me carrying me forward, I think, like your, your, your podcast is called Stories of Hope and Hard Times. And I think hope can start with these daily action steps that you build automatic, you build into be automatic, where, you know, reading my scriptures was something that I had done daily for life for a long time. And I started to recognize the power of habits in keeping your momentum moving forward, when life kind of builds this wall around you be it, Mohini be it be it bullying, all these things where we have these self limiting beliefs, and external forces that seem to be pushing down on us.
Jeff Corrigan 10:40
And I think habits can really help us to break free from those and and get into a routine that is moving us forward, even though life seems to be trying to push us back. So at the time, we, you know, I was I had a daily journal writing habit that I was doing, we I did my scripture reading every day, like I had done scripture, reading every day for a very long time. And it always just seems normal and mundane. Until, until you really come into something difficult.
Jeff Corrigan 11:27
Then you start seeing, Oh, wow, God is telling me things. Well, I'm also you know, I'm a, I'm an avid personal development reader, and listener. So listening to those books and reading the scriptures, you start to see these patterns of, hey, they're saying the same thing. There's the principle that's being taught in the scriptures is actually the same principle that's being taught here, and how can I apply it in my real life, and you start to see these things helping you out from both ends of the spectrum, whether it's, you know, the angels on earth, or your Heavenly Father talking through prophets of older prophets, current prophets, and giving you direction.
Jeff Corrigan 12:30
And I'm going off too long on this. But But essentially, my wife, and I, through lots of prayer and seeking, and we just made it a habit to consistently be pushing forward until we got answers. And we finally got somebody to tell us, Oh, hey, like, I'll take your blood work. And, you know, as a naturopath, not not a medical doctor, and not not to say one is better than the other, they both have the different facets, but we came to really embrace the fact that every medical professional or health care professional has their different area of expertise. And you can't just rely on one to tell you everything. And so we started to see like, oh, this person gave us this little nugget. And this person gave us this little nugget and started to put those pieces together to create a whole story.
Jeff Corrigan 13:12
And luckily, we were able to find out that she was actually she was diagnosed with Hashimotos, which is an autoimmune disorder that a lot of you probably suffer from, it's very common among women, these days, and even some men. But it's, it can do all sorts of things. It can, it can hit, you can have weight gain, you know, weight loss, you can have anxiety, it can, it can manifest itself in all kinds of different ways. And so we finally knew and had an answer to why she was struggling, right? And up to that point had been like this big giant question mark of what's going on. And I'm trying to work two jobs. And and then, you know, she wasn't feeling very motivated in a lot of areas because of all the struggles. And so, you know, I'd come home and, you know, I tried to make dinner and do lots of things that in the meantime, while I was transitioning to this other job, and I wouldn't say I was a single parent, because that's not true.
Jeff Corrigan 14:03
But at times, if there were days, it felt that way, right, where you're like, Oh, I'm trying to do it all and, and having that relief of knowing what was going on, and then having some answers of to, okay, here's some things we can try. And those things worked a little bit. And then they worked a little bit more. And we finally found someone who knew a lot about it, and was able to help us a ton and get her to a place where it's not something you can cure, but it is something you can manage. And it really comes down to what you're eating and the supplements you're taking. And so we shifted our whole diets.
Jeff Corrigan 14:37
And the interesting thing about that this is maybe unrelated to our topic today, but I think what's happened for us is a complete lifestyle change, right? Like we're both much healthier individuals, we eat much healthier foods, our whole diet changed. And I just joined her in it because I wanted to support her and I felt like Hey, I should do these things. Anyway, these are healthy options better option. As in my life, so I started to create better eating habits, right? We don't drink any sugary drinks, we just basically drink water like, and this isn't like self promotion, I'm just saying, you know, these changes happen little by little.
Jeff Corrigan 15:12
And that's what habits really are. I think sometimes we think, Oh, if I'm, if I'm going to be a writer than I need to, I need to write a whole book right now. It's like, well, that's not, that's not how it starts. And if I'm gonna be a healthy person, then I have to cut out everything bad right now. And I don't think that's how it works. I think you start building habits little by little, that transition you into becoming a new you and creating that identity shift. That gives you a future. And it's really what created hope in the hard times was having something to fall back on a habit or routine that's moving you in a positive direction.
Tamara Anderson 15:49
Well, and I love that you brought in the God component, because sometimes we go to God and we say, okay, my wife has a health challenge. Can you help you help us either heal her or figure this out? And we expect these instant answers from God. And God, most often doesn't work that way. I mean, I've had things where I get an instant answer.
Tamara Anderson 16:16
And so I'm not saying it never happens, but but he almost usually works just that line upon line, precept upon precept is what it says in the scriptures, right. And so he, he just takes us one little step at a time, I loved how you said, how you got a nugget here, from this health care provider and a nugget there and everything finally added up to the correct diagnosis. And then you were able to find out what you needed to do. And you probably just baby step your way into that different diet. And, okay, this supplement will help and that adds another step to the path. And so if we're talking about habits, here it is, it is baby stepping your way to something.
Jeff Corrigan 17:04
Yeah.
Tamara Anderson 17:04
And so I'm sure that there's people out there that probably set the goal to Okay, I'm gonna lose 30 pounds this year, you know, and they're like, Okay, I'm off to the races. I'm gonna start working out, I'm gonna do X, Y, and Z. And they're probably here going. I'm still the same way. And it really sucks. And I just want to give up, do you know what I mean? And so what would you say to somebody like that? Who's feeling like, I'm trying so hard right now. But I'm not seeing the progress that I want. What would you say to them?
Jeff Corrigan 17:47
Just going back to my wife's health issue, right? When we even when we had the correct diagnosis, and we found somebody to help her. The process took a while, like, it took us two years to get her to a point where she was like, Okay, I'm is manageable. Right? It was, like you said, it was a long process. It was definitely two years from when she really started feeling it to the point where she was like, Okay, I have more good days than I have bad days.
Jeff Corrigan 18:11
Now. I think to someone who's who's looking to have that transition in their life, it's resetting your expectations. I think you talk about this a lot. You know, being a mother of two children who are diagnosed with autism, where you had to reset your expectations of what your life was, what's normal for me, right? We had to find a new normal from for my wife, and for me, right? It's like, okay, as a husband, to someone who's struggling with that, like, I don't pretend like it's hard, harder. For me, it's definitely harder for her. But there's still some challenges being her, her her partner in all things right. And seeing her go through that is really difficult, because I love her.
Jeff Corrigan 18:45
And so with someone who, who's that situation, I think it's finding out not necessarily what the result you want is, but going in and figuring out, okay, what's the identity shift I'm trying to make, right? It's maybe losing 30 pounds is the goal, because you've heard a lot of people say it and you think, Oh, well, losing 30 pounds, I'll be a more fit looking person. Well, I think it's better to look at that and say, okay, so really what you're looking for is a healthier lifestyle, to be a more fit person, a more healthy person.
Jeff Corrigan 19:21
And it's not so much about on trying to lose pounds, because you can be a healthy person and maybe weigh the same weight. Right? It's, it's, it's about identifying what actions I can take to live a healthier lifestyle and become that healthier person that maybe will result in a lower weight. But maybe changing that expectation from Oh, I have to be this lower weight to be healthy instead to say, Well, I'm just going to be a healthier person and do these things that a healthier person would do. You know, what do you got Sheldon?
Sheldon Mills 19:51
Well, I feel like honestly, it sounds like a fairly simple question, but I think it's not because you're basically asking like, how do I change Like, how do I become different or more? Or on the surface-- It's like, oh, I tried and I failed. But at the end of the day, that's like, the epitome of life. It's how do we, how do we how do we change? How do we grow? How do we become different? Right? And I think that there are so many factors are part of that. Jeff was going into a little bit of some of the, you know, we talked more about this, like finding your real, why, right, your real motivation to more practical stuff, you know, from having accountability people to help push you a lot like a tribe, that gives you encouragement.
Sheldon Mills 20:38
And, and, you know, to we talk about, I think we talked about this with you, Tamara, maybe when you're on our podcast, you know, to what happens when, you know, you're in the garden, there's this, this weed that you just can't, can't get rid of. It's like, well, you know, practice gets you stronger in the same time, might as well find a professional gardener who specializes in like this thing. Right? I think that, you know, there's 1001 answers to your, your, your question here. But ultimately, it comes down to, like, if you want to change your life, you have to change something you do daily, right.
Sheldon Mills 21:17
And the fastest way to change this is to change something to do daily, I think the secret to a foundation of success to change a daily routine, which is kind of like our take, at least on this course is like okay, this the change, you want either an identity mind shift the goal, right, and so it's ways to make that sticky. Like one of the things I just said is like an accountability partner, right? Someone who can be an encouragement, keep you accountable and, and give you that motivation that when you don't feel it, you don't I mean, we all have these, we set these goals when we feel highly motivated.
Sheldon Mills 21:52
But life is ups and downs, you're gonna get to a point where you don't feel that anymore. Right. So so how do you keep on going to the point? And and everybody listening has lots of habits that make them successful now, even if you don't think so. Right. Like, it would be hard for me to go to sleep without brushing my teeth at night at this point, right? That's a habit, right? Same with saying my prayers at night. I don't, I've just done it for so many years. You could stretch it if you stretch it to the limits, like like a bad habit is like an addiction, you know, like this, this habit that's become such a habit that you almost don't have power over it anymore. But well have lots of good habits that, that get us up in the morning that connect us with God and connect us with our family. Right? So we're trying to help people figure that out, but more consciously decide and understand the why behind it and to apply how to make those things sticky. Right?
Tamara Anderson 22:47
I like the word sticky. Because often we think of the word sticky as stuck. But if we want to get stuck in something we want to get stuck in good habits. Yeah. And and so maybe it's just taking that I'm stuck in this old habit to saying, Okay, well, then I know I can get stuck in habits. I'm stuck in some bad ones right now. Just shifting that to Okay, now I'd like to get stuck in a new habit. Right.
Jeff Corrigan 23:25
Yeah, it really is making that conscious decision. And the cool thing about the course is that by the end, you have a checklist to help you make that new action, a sticky habit. Well, first we aligned with, Okay, what's the person you want to be and we decide what action you can take. And we want it to be challenging, but easy enough that you can do it right. So it's like, hey, it stretches me but not so much that I won't do it. And and then giving you six tools to apply to that one action that will turn it into a habit for you. Or help you make it into a habit.
Sheldon Mills 23:59
I think ultimately you want people we want to help people learn. It's called the Habit Masters is that renaming, right because it's almost it's less about the one specific habit and more about learning how to become good at creating habits, right? Like what it takes to become an do which you want to do as another quick story. You know, I have a friend who went to the gym, was willing to have few minutes, went back out. And the person at the desk was I was quick. You know, I just pride was a little bit. A base basically said, you know, today it was more about the habit of going to the gym and doing my routine than it was about the result of of the workout. Does that make sense? It's like,
Tamara Anderson 24:45
Hey, I'm here basically,
Sheldon Mills 24:47
Exactly
Jeff Corrigan 24:48
Got out the door
Sheldon Mills 24:49
It was a habit of going, it was more important than the actual workout. Does that make sense? Because he knew how to build and make those habits stick even if today was one Have those days, it's like the best I could do is show up and do like two reps and call it a day. Right?
Tamara Anderson 25:09
But you went. Let me ask this question. So you said that you have some fundamental six fundamental things that that you teach in your course. What is one of the ones that you can maybe dive into a little bit today to give our, our listeners Yeah, just just a taste of some of, I mean, I know you've read hundreds and hundreds of books between the two of you figuring this out, and so that you were able to create this course to make it simple and easy to digest, and all that. So give us the nuts and bolts of one of the fundamentals to building these habits,
Tamara Anderson 25:50
We're going to take a quick break, but when we get back, we'll have more lessons, tips and things you can apply to your life. Stay tuned.
Tamara Anderson 25:57
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Tamara Anderson 27:17
And all that. So give us the nuts and bolts of one of the fundamentals to building these habits?
Jeff Corrigan 27:23
So this one, so they call it upper and lower limits. We got this and we won't pretend like this is our idea, right? This is something that we got from Greg McEwan, and you can read about it in his book, Effortless, right? But we've used it ever since we've learned about it. And in all honesty, you've most likely use this as well. The cool thing about these fundamentals is that they're not new, right? These are not, we're not coming up with these on the spot. These are things that have been taught and trained and practiced for centuries, maybe even 1000s of years.
Jeff Corrigan 27:52
And it's just things that we we've taken like Tamara said over the last decade of reading and studying about taking action and in progress in life and learning new habits. You know, from the books triggers and atomic habits and the power of habit and pretty much any habit book you can think of I've read this point, but too many, too many, there's hundreds of ideas. And so really the point of this course isn't isn't to give you more ideas is to establish a few ideas that anyone can modify and use in their own life to make their habits sticky, right. So I just want to reiterate reiterate that one more time. But upper and lower limits is one of my favorite new, it's new to me, essentially, favorite ones, because it helps you stay in and get back into a routine, if ever you get out of it. Or if ever you're trying to build it. Right. So one of the things we tend to do is we think oh, like I started out a competition with my brother in law, my sister a couple of years ago doing you know, we want to do 100 Pull ups every day for a month. And
Tamara Anderson 28:53
Man!
Jeff Corrigan 28:55
It's a lot
Tamara Anderson 28:55
That as a lot. Keep going. sorry.
Jeff Corrigan 28:59
I don't do them all at once. Right? You do them in sets, but and as I got started, I wasn't able to do 100 yet, right? So I had to build up to that. And there were days, right where, after you've done 50 To 60 to 70 pull ups in a day, the next day, you're really sore. Right? So so you may not be able to do a full 60-70. So you it's really important to set yourself a lower limit.
Jeff Corrigan 29:26
So many times I think we think, oh I'm gonna write in maybe I'm gonna go to the gym four times a week, when you start off your goal. And then when you don't meet that, you're suddenly like, well, I didn't meet my goal. So I'm not going to go at all anymore. We ended up all or nothing right with our goals. And that's really one of the biggest flaws we ever do and goals is that we set this all or nothing goal like I'm gonna do this for 30 days and if you miss a day you just stop entirely.
Jeff Corrigan 29:50
So the beautiful part about the upper lower limits is if you ever aren't feeling fully motivated, or if you do miss a day, the next day, get back in To routine using your lower limit to say, okay, look, normally I like to read a page in my journal, but what on those days that get really busy and convoluted and suddenly it's midnight I don't like oh man is supposed to be in bed two hours ago or an hour and a half ago. And, and and you just I mean, we all know those days we get no matter who you are no matter how good your routine, right, there's no perfect scenario and there's always things that come up.
Jeff Corrigan 30:21
So having a lower limit is awesome. So your lower limit could be like I write at least a sentence, anybody can write a sentence right before they go to bed or write when they wake up in the morning, even if you miss the timeframe to write a whole page or so it's giving yourself okay, my max. And then the beautiful part about the upper limit is that is that you don't overdo it, we tend the other. The other flaw that happens with our goals is that we tend to overdo things. We say, Oh, I'm gonna write a page. But then we get into the flow. And we're like, Well, I'm just gonna write 20 pages, and then we don't write. Right? We wore out all our writing. So giving ourselves a max of what we're going to do is also vital, right?
Jeff Corrigan 31:03
So giving that lower limit is really what can get you back into the routine or keep you in the routine on the days you you're struggling. And then having a max is making sure that you're staying consistent and not like burning yourself out. Because we tend to either have like I said, we're all or nothing. So this is a beautiful tactic that is just an unbelievable strategy. And there's a story a really cool story that Greg McEwan shares in his book about this that Sheldon has, can we share it with you Tamara?
Tamara Anderson 31:29
Yeah,
Jeff Corrigan 31:29
I know the timeframe. Okay, share, Sheldon. Sheldon shared this story. We did a presentation about this the other day, and he's he's got it down. So.
Sheldon Mills 31:38
Okay. It's another true story about reaching the South Pole, like a race. I can't remember what you know, I mean, decades ago, but it was a race to be the first to reach the South Pole. And a couple of teams sit out the exact same time. And long story short, this works really well, because one is basically the same weather conditions, because they were doing it roughly at the same time. And they were pretty bad. And the result is that that one team was the first to get there, make it back and the other team actually died and never came back. Right.
Sheldon Mills 32:11
But there's journals of both to compare it. And long story short, the team that made it their back did it in relative ease, which is kind of weird to say, realizing the other team actually died and journal entries. Right. But they set an upper and lower limit at how many miles they could go in a day. And regardless of the weather, it's like lower, I think the lower was 10 miles and the upper was like 25, or I can't remember the exact range. And one of the things they were doing like they were close to their goal, I think they were like 32 miles away from their destination, and the nice, beautiful sunny day. And yeah, when they hit their limit, they stopped. And they made it made it back.
Sheldon Mills 32:57
And the whole point of the story was journal entries. I mean, sadly enough, these journal entries of you know, when when they were found their bodies and things like that are just like, the mentality is so different. You already mean it was like they would on good days, they would push to the point of exhaustion. And on bad days, they would just like hunker down in misery and go nowhere, right. And that's why upper and lower limit is like no matter how bad it is, you have your lower limit, right? It's just like just enough to keep the habit going. And you and you need to feel success with that.
Sheldon Mills 33:32
And an upper limit is important because the biggest enemy, the consistency in a project or goal is not having an upper limit. Like it's never enough. I never exercise enough. I never go to the gym enough. Do you know what I mean? And it leaves you like, there's no goal, there's no finish line. Right? And so, I don't know, if you've read a gap in the game, right? It leaves you in the gap. It's like this, this horizon line that you never can get to. Right. So this is really powerful reframes your, your habit or your action step to something that's like, okay, when, when today's crappy, I am going to do stretches for five minutes while I'm watching my movie.
Sheldon Mills 34:20
That's one of my lower limits is like when today it's just one of those days, I didn't get anything, I can lay down on the floor and do some yoga for five minutes at night. Do you know what I mean? That's my lower limit, and you need to be able to like feel good about that. And then there's upper limits. And it's like, you gotta have like, a goal you got to have when enough is enough, because I think too many of us it's like, it's never enough.
Jeff Corrigan 34:44
Right. There's a there's a great quote from thing as Jon Acuff who talks aboutthis like, what does done look like right? Yes, that question what is done look like and I think you having what done looks like every day is vital. Um, And that can be your max, it can be your upper or your lower limit, right? Maybe today, done was my lower limit, maybe tomorrow, my upper limits might done right. And I think it just gives you that freedom to realize, hey, it's not about getting there tomorrow, it's about progress each day. And just like those guys, they stopped. What was 20 miles from the finish line, because they had met their upper limit for the day. And they didn't get there for another two days, because that's how many miles they were willing to go per day.
Jeff Corrigan 35:29
And he wrote in his journal at the end, he, they found it in his journal that said, "we did it with relative ease," right. And that I think that's a funny, funny way to look at it. And as we've talked to people on our show, and interviewed some, some really successful people. One of them is Jake Parker. He's a, he's like a professional illustrator, and just a super cool guy. One of my favorite lines from our episode with him as he's one of the best times in my career was when I was in this like, great flow. And he's like, and honestly, the workflow was more like a yawn. Right?
Jeff Corrigan 36:00
So it's like, it wasn't like he was pushing super hard to do all this stuff he was accomplishing a lot by being consistent in his daily routine. And from the book, Atomic Habits, by James Clear, has a couple of lines in here that I really liked. He says, "decide the type of person you want to be, and prove it to yourself with small wins." And I think that's the key with with this course, is what we're trying to help people do is, decide who you want to be. And prove it to yourself with small daily wins. And when you miss a day, it's okay. You don't stop, you know, stop, you don't quit the goal. That's normally what we do. But the goal is to find a lower limit and continue. So
Tamara Anderson 36:40
Oh, I love that. That is so cool. I'm so glad that you dove in and taught me all about that upper and lower limits. I'm sitting here thinking okay, Tamara, now I'm going to set all my goals with the upper and the lower limits.
Sheldon Mills 36:57
I had a friend who is a coach, a fitness coach, and people have asked me what is the best exercise routine and you'd be like, whatever it is that you actually do, do you because it's kind of like the the habit of you got to do something that you know, even when you don't necessarily feel like it, you like it enough enjoy it enough. Like you'll do it like that's what's best, because I think we have to do this Herculean effort, right? But anything that we really do consistency daily, even if it's not, doesn't feel like a lot in the moment, like data has a way bigger impact in the long term, then, you know, weekend warrior, and hurting.
Tamara Anderson 37:38
I was just thinking as you guys were talking about this, this whole principle, the the idea popped into my mind was it's the tortoise and the hare. It's totally the tortoise and the hare. I mean, I don't know how long that story has been around. But that's that's what this principle is. It's the tortoise and the hare and it's just consistent progress. Yeah. And so maybe he's, you know, your buddies are all in the gym, and they're just taken off like a hair and you're the tortoise and that's okay, as long as you just keep going. Because, yeah, consistent effort is what helps us establish the habit in the long run. Yeah, so before we go, let's talk a little bit. I know, Jeff, you had a quote that you wanted to share. And then Sheldon, you had a Bible verse that you wanted to share. So let's let's do those on before we wrap this up?
Jeff Corrigan 38:32
Yes, well, so this quote actually comes from Dieter F. Uchtdorf, who is a leader in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. And he, in one of his talks, he's he's talking about daily restoration. And he says, "as our days go, so go our lives." And he references an author. "One author put it this way, a day is like a whole life. You start out doing one thing, but end up doing something else. Planned to run an errand but never get there. And at the end of your life, your whole existence has that same haphazard quality too. Your whole life has the same shape as a single day."
Jeff Corrigan 39:08
That was from Michael Creighton, right? He wrote Jurassic Park and but he says, "Do you want to change the shape of your life, change the shape of your day? Do you want to change your day, change this hour, change what you think feel and do at this very moment." And I feel like that that really sums up the concept of we're trying to get to is, is when you change the shape of 10 minutes, it can change the shape of your hour when you change the shape of an hour it can change the shape of your day and and a day can shape a month and so on right?
Jeff Corrigan 39:37
And it's like you just said I we never make progress in giant lumps, right? It's almost always little by little. And to the outside. It looks like giant lumps. Like I remember. I remember when when things started to come together for me right I saw you know, my after my wife's challenges for two years I saw a 2020 Pound Drop in my weight was much more fit, you know, exercise The more regularly eating healthier foods, and to the outside world, it looked like I just dropped 20 pounds, like I had people be like, Would you do and I was like, well, two years ago, I stopped eating sugar started running regularly, I started, like, I could lift off things. To them, it looked like this miracle of transformation. Right?
Jeff Corrigan 40:17
I also saw like a five times jump in my income. It's like, what Well, what was that? Well, it was little tiny things, building businesses here and there having opportunities and taking them at the chances they came. And then it's just one of those things where to the outside world that can look like these, this giant transformation because they don't know what's what's really going on in your life. And I think your your, your podcast is a perfect example of that. All these hard times that people are going through, everyone's going through them. And it's it's a matter of, of making that consistent progress during those times. So that when the good times come, you're ready to receive all the blessings, right? Anyway, so that was that was one of those quotes that we really liked and wanted to share.
Tamara Anderson 40:59
Thank you. I love that. And you're right, it. I love the idea of just starting and change this moment. Decide today, I'm going to change, I'm going to improve. Alright, Sheldon, hit us with your Bible verse that goes along with all this.
Sheldon Mills 41:17
Yeah, I'm pretty sure most of you will be familiar with this. It's in James chapter three, verse four, and it says, "Behold, also the ships, which though they'd be so great, and are driven of fierce winds, yet they are turned about the very small Helm." Right? There's this idea that a small rudder can steer a large ship, like small bricks, build a mansion, and, you know, little seed Giant Sequoias, right? It's like the, the minutes and hours well spent, are the building blocks of a good life. Right? So we, we want big changes in their lives. But it really is like, the little things like those little small changes do end up being the big things. So
Tamara Anderson 42:02
Oh, that's great. I had a little small thing that I did. The other day, I found that I had, over the holidays, when I was sick, I downloaded a game on my phone. I love that I'm totally confessing this to you guys. And it was fun. But it was one of those that like, it could just suck up all your time. And because I wanted to keep going to the next level, the next level, oh, well, I'm going to stop after the next level. But then it'd be Oh, but I want to do that. I want to go to the next level. And finally, as I came to this week, and I was praying, I'm like, I have got to get back. You know, I've got to get my game on. I've got to keep moving.
Tamara Anderson 42:43
Then I realized I kind of stepped back and said, You need to delete that app. I was actually praying about it. And that was the thought that came you need to delete that app is sucking too much of your time. And so sometimes it's just those small little decisions. And I did I deleted the app guys. I'm so proud.
Jeff Corrigan 43:02
willpower thats awesome
Tamara Anderson 43:04
I did I deleted the app. And I'm like, Okay, that was just sucking too much my time. And I have way more important things that I need to do. And I'm not saying that you can't reward yourself by playing a game, I still have other games on my phone. But they don't uck up as much as my my time. So sometimes it's just doing something like that. If you have something that's you want more time in your life, and you have an app on your phone that's sucking up a lot of your time.
Jeff Corrigan 43:33
It's true. That's one way to get out of it. Just separate yourself.
Tamara Anderson 43:40
I know so little painful, but it's okay, I survived.
Jeff Corrigan 43:44
You just talked about one little note here is you talked about the psychology of games, right and why we get sucked into them. And then I can't remember which book it is, but that he references someone who has their plan to develop new new skills in their life. And he wants to be able to play the banjo I believe anyway, and so he he created this little anybody who was like a lifetime gamer, and just you know, he spends almost all of his time playing video games. But he decided he was going to start creating in his real life, what existed in video games so that he would like enjoy learning new skills and things like that.
Jeff Corrigan 44:20
So he gave himself different levels where he's like, Hey, okay, Banjo level one is like learning to play this song level two is is like going and playing for friends and family level three is going this he says in the boss level. Because the boss level is I go play a What's that song called? You know that the devil goes down to Georgia is that it? Like I go play that in an Irish pub, right? Like that was was getting kind of gave him these levels of okay, here's what I wanna do. And eventually I'm gonna play his Boss-level where I'm gonna play the banjo in an Irish pub, one of the hardest songs right and anyway, it got me thinking about when you were saying I was And he sucked into this game. And I haven't really, I'll be confessed here that I haven't put into practice the leveling up and boss level so much in my own goals. But I think it'd be it would be maybe that's what I should do this year is is practice that skill as an amplifier into habit building. But
Tamara Anderson 45:18
that's awesome. All right guys, well we've talked a whole bunch about Habit Masters, but you have not told me where I can find it. I know it's super short, it's like you can do it as quick as seven days and then repeat but tell us where we can find it, and how much it costs and all that.
Jeff Corrigan 45:37
So it's called Habit Masters. It's actually on our website, currently ideagym.info. And it's it's a course that you can do in seven days, right. And the main gist of the course, if I were to give you three things that you're going to get from it, number one, is will help you identify and clarify the person you want to become right? What's the identity shift, you're looking to make it we'll help you identify a very clear action step you can take daily to help you get there. And then last, and most importantly, it will give you six fundamentals that you can apply to that action step.
Jeff Corrigan 46:08
And it's basically a checklist that you can use not just in building that habit, but any habit you want to build in the future. So that you can start using those things regularly and really becoming a master of habit building, right? Mastery is all about knowing of knowing something well enough that you can apply it in multiple areas, right? So you know that these fundamentals of habit building that you probably already use in your own habits, right? These are things that you've used in your life, and you just didn't know it, right? You haven't you haven't ever consciously thought, I'm going to do this thing. And here's how I do it. Right.
Jeff Corrigan 46:42
But we do believe in the modified version. So just remember always there, your way is better than no way, right. So if the way that you were explaining it, or the way that you've seen other people do it seems too hard for you then figure out another way to leverage that principle in your life. Because it will help you build better habits. It's just a matter of figuring out what works for you. And I think Tamar has talked about that with like, what's normal for you? Okay, well, what's the modified version for you? Right? What's the modified version of this? I'm not very organized. So doing like an hour of prepping every day isn't really in my plan, but maybe I can do. Okay, I'll pick three things I can do today. On my checklist, right? The one example, that could work. So find it on our website, Ideagen dot info. Cost right now is going to be $98. But that's for two people. Right? So you're really you have to deal with a buddy. And so it's two for one always. And for you guys who are on Tamara's podcasts or listening to Tamara's podcast, we're gonna do a half price.
Tamara Anderson 47:41
I'm in! Sign me up.
Jeff Corrigan 47:46
Well, Tamara, we'll have to let you go through it because we need your feedback. So yes.
Tamara Anderson 47:52
No, that is great. So do they have to have a special code to get the half off discount?
Sheldon Mills 47:59
Yes, we'll
Tamara Anderson 48:00
give you the code. And should I put it in the show notes?
Jeff Corrigan 48:02
Yes, put in the show notes. Send it to your people. And we'll just
Tamara Anderson 48:06
guys, you have to jump on this. I know. For me, it's always good to learn these- I almost want to call it habit hacks. Because it sounds kind of cool. So if you want some habit hacks, go to the ideagym.info checkout Habit Masters. Sign up, get it half off. So I mean, holy cow, guys 25 bucks to learn these habit hacks. You can you can do that. I promise. Because you got to split it with somebody. Right?
Jeff Corrigan 48:38
Yes, exactly. You're exactly right. Yep. So it's gonna be 25 though, that it was somebody.
Tamara Anderson 48:43
And that way you have a built in accountability partner. And I know that both Jeff, Sheldon and I have all used accountability groups. I have a weekly accountability group that I established with a couple of author friends and we talk every Monday morning. And it's great.
Tamara Anderson 48:59
But it's good to have people who are holding you accountable that you say okay, here, here's my goals for the week. And sometimes guys, the great thing about accountability groups is sometimes you hit it and sometimes you miss it. And so pick somebody who's going to be loving and lenient, but also hold you to it because you're going to have weeks that you get sick, but you're also going to have weeks that you're going to be celebrating some huge wins. so it's good to have somebody with you along that journey. And maybe you can pray about who you should choose your accountability partner because it really does make a difference. And Jeff and Sheldon are actually each other's accountability partners. How great is that?
Jeff Corrigan 49:38
It's really cool
Tamara Anderson 49:41
Yep, all right, guys. Well, this has been super fun. Thank you so much for being willing to share with us about your amazing Habit Masters course and sharing all these amazing habit hacks, especially the upper and lower limit and, and and how we can get out of our limiting beliefs by building how bets that help us get through hard times. So thank you for being with me today.
Sheldon Mills 50:04
Thank you.
Jeff Corrigan 50:05
It's our pleasure. Thanks so much.
Tamara Anderson 50:08
Hey, thanks so much for listening to today's show. If you like what you heard, subscribe so you can get your weekly dose of powerful stories of hope. I know there are many of you out there who are going through a hard time, and I hope you found useful things that you can apply to your own life in today's podcast. If you'd like to access the show notes of today's show, please visit my website stories of hope podcast.com. There you will find a summary of today's show, the transcript and one of my favorite takeaways. You know, if someone kept coming to mind during today's episode, perhaps that means that you should share this episode with them. Maybe there was a story shared or quote, or a scripture verse that they really really need to hear. So go ahead and share this podcast. May God bless you, especially if you are struggling with hope to carry on and the strength to keep going when things get tough. Remember to walk with Christ and He will help you bear the burden. And above all outs. Remember God loves you.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai